Are you a "Grown-Up"?

I have heard this question a lot the past couple weeks. Soemtimes it's "When did you realize you were an adult?" or "Do your parents ever see you as an adult?". In the end the question always boils down to pretty much the same thing. Have you passed from child to adult? I have considered myself an adult since I bought my first business at the ripe old age of 20. To me that proved I was really an adult. Looking back though I never felt like an adult and I don't think I acted like an adult. I still depended deeply on my parents and no major decision was made on my own.

Fast forward three years. Right about the time I turned 23 is when I made my first real adult decision. I decided I would move in with my boyfriend and start our life together. My family dynamic changed to include him as a permanent fixture. It was a huge step that I didn't really see at the time. We had only been dating for about 6 months when we moved in together. It turned my world upside down. Suddenly I was responsible for putting dinner on the table not for just myself but for him too. If you know Scott, than you know this is something that must be done by 7:30 no questions asked. He is a person who thrives on schedule and order where I grew up more on the chaos theory. With two working parents and three kids with busy schedules, a set dinner stopped occurring after middle school. The Kitchen was not completely foreign territory to me but it was not familiar either. I could make simple things usually starting with a box but if you asked for something from scratch, I usually looked at you as if you were an alien. I wanted to impress my significant other and live up to the standard of food he was use to from his parents so I hit the books and began my cooking adventure. A year later and I very rarely use anything from a box unless I have to. Having my own kitchen has added to my increased feeling of being an adult. I have my own set of tools and gadgets that I hold dear and like knowing I can through a dinner party without so much as breaking a sweat.

Another aspect of my life that changed drastically and pushed me into adult hood is my two dogs. We found the little guys on craigslist and immediately fell in love with them. Little did I know they would entail so much work. Scott grew up with dogs and has experienced what it takes to raise good dogs. I however have had none. We had 2 dogs growing up. One that we left behind in Florida and the second one only made it 3 years before my Dad gave it to a loving family. I figured they were good protection and Scott would take care of the rest. I almost laugh at myself looking back now. The first week with the new puppies was hell on wheels. They were too small to sleep outside and the only suitable place in the house for them was the kitchen. For the first week they did not sleep more than 2 hours at a time and if they weren’t sleeping they wanted to be held. Scott could sleep through the crying but I couldn’t. So every two hours it was me and the puppies. Add in cleaning up poop and pee that always seemed to miss the newspaper and I was about ready to give the dogs away. I realize new moms go through this all the time and that the dogs would grow out of it much quicker than babies do but it was still a long hard week. The dogs sleep outside now and are much more of a pleasure than a nuisance. The responsibility of another living being even if it is a dog really makes you feel like an adult. I am responsible for their health and welfare. I can’t forget to give them water in the morning or food at night. If we go away for more than 12 hours we have to make arrangements for them too. We also have to pack for them when we go away. It truly is like a practice child. So far we pass but there are times I take great pleasure in knowing if I get frustrated with them, I can just throw them in the backyard and take a break.

I would say I am an adult. But I still have a long way to go. There should be a name for this stage in life. Your no longer a teenager but still not really a full fledge adult. Sometimes I still wake up and want to pinch myself because it all doesn’t feel real.